16 May 2019
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Luxembourg officials are warning about a potentially strong outbreak of the Eurovision Song Contest this year, and they are advising newcomers — ...16/05/2019
Newcomers warned against accidental exposure to Eurovision
9 May 2019
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In commemoration of Europe Day in Luxembourg, a crowd of employees from European Union institutions gathered at a document burial site in Kirchberg to pay ...09/05/2019
EU employees lay flowers at site where thousands of unread reports are buried
3 May 2019
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Responding to complaints that the country is two shades too quiet, Luxembourg officials have announced a plan to import up to 500 anarchist street punks ...03/05/2019
Luxembourg to import hundreds of anarchist street punks
24 April 2019
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In a display of extreme willingness to integrate, a family that moved to Luxembourg earlier this year will literally do anything as long as they believe ...24/04/2019
Expat family will literally do anything if told it’s ‘tradition’
16 April 2019
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HOWALD -- A local grandmother says she’s eager to meet the new owners of the house next door, and that she’s baking them one of her famous apple cakes to ...16/04/2019
Grandmother bakes cake for investment fund that bought house next door
11 April 2019
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Proving that the country is keeping its eyes on the stars, Luxembourg has announced it has invested 50 million euros in a company that plans on mining a ...11/04/2019
Luxembourg invests €50 million to mine black hole
3 April 2019
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The Luxembourg Wurst Shocking discovery: hundreds of corporate juniors living in tunnel below KirchbergKIRCHBERG -- Two sisters playing in a patch of trees have made a shocking discovery, one that will radically change our understanding of how those who ...03/04/2019
Shocking discovery: hundreds of corporate juniors living in tunnel below Kirchberg
27 March 2019
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LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Explaining that she wanted to see a dear friend and ask for a little favour, on Wednesday Queen Elizabeth II paid an impromptu visit to ...27/03/2019
Queen Elizabeth casually asks Grand Duke Henri for Luxembourgish citizenship
21 March 2019
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A supermarket executive responsible for some of Luxembourg’s most popular individually wrapped fruits and vegetables has struck again, this time with ...21/03/2019
‘Individually wrapped strawberries,’ announces excited supermarket exec
13 March 2019
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LUXEMBOURG-VILLE -- A woman who staunchly upholds the practice of three cheek kisses remained motionless for a whole evening when a friend stopped after ...13/03/2019
Woman frozen whole evening waiting for third cheek kiss
7 March 2019
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Respecting a tradition that goes back to at least the 1750s, members of Luxembourg’s secretive cycling community are gathering this weekend in a private ...07/03/2019
Luxembourg cyclists participate in Vëlobrennen to ensure good riding season
27 February 2019
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A report issued by a consortium of Luxembourg’s largest news outlets has confirmed that nothing happened in Luxembourg today.27/02/2019
Report: not one thing happened in Luxembourg today
20 February 2019
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A wolf that was sniffing around Luxembourg for a new den has announced that due to the high prices here, he and his pack have decided to live over the ...20/02/2019
Wolf chooses to live in Belgium after seeing cost of dens here
13 February 2019
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A local man who has been putting away money for a special trip has announced he is finally taking his girlfriend on the taxi ride they’ve always dreamed ...13/02/2019
Luxembourg man saves up to take girlfriend on exciting trip in taxi
6 February 2019
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Despite weeks of intensive training to build his psychological endurance, a Luxembourg man has been left in a state of emotional ruin following a car ...06/02/2019
Grown man destroyed by visit to Control Technique
30 January 2019
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Police in Luxembourg are asking the public to be on the lookout for members of a criminal gang who for weeks have been illegally warming up their cars in ...30/01/2019
Gang of illegal car warmer-uppers operating in Luxembourg
23 January 2019
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Travelling by foot from as far away as Brussels, thousands of car worshippers are flocking to Luxembourg this weekend for the start of the annual ...23/01/2019
Thousands of car worshippers arrive for Lux Autofestival
16 January 2019
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Responding to the increasing number of pedestrians in Luxembourg who are stuck to their smartphones and enter crosswalks without looking up, a local man ...16/01/2019
New app warns pedestrians in crosswalk when car is about to hit them
11 January 2019
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GASPERICH — In an incident that experts say proves that youth run the show, dozens of bus passengers were unable to muster the courage on Friday morning ...11/01/2019
No one in bus courageous enough to confront teen about music
4 January 2019
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The Luxembourg Wurst Expat just assumed you were supposed to eat the porcelain thing inside ‘galette des rois’A man who has lived in the Grand Duchy for nearly a decade is recovering in hospital after having ingested dozens of porcelain figurines over the years. ...04/01/2019
Expat just assumed you were supposed to eat the porcelain thing inside ‘galette des rois’
9 November 2018
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One of Luxembourg’s most visible figures has found herself embroiled in a scandal after being spotted with a prominent banker.09/11/2018
Scandal: Gëlle Fra caught with Tall Banker
26 October 2018
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KIRCHBERG -- Hundreds of savage bank employees swarmed into the Auchan commercial centre around 12:30 p.m. on Friday, fanning out in every direction and ...26/10/2018
Lunchtime horror: pack of feral bankers go on rampage through Auchan
7 October 2018
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A recent study shows that while some cross-border workers don’t actually enjoy the hellish daily commute into and out of Luxembourg, a majority find it ...07/10/2018
Majority of cross-border workers ‘masochists’
20 September 2018
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An agreement between the country’s most outspoken smokers and its angriest non-smokers was reached late Wednesday night, leading many to believe that ...20/09/2018
Compromise: Luxembourg smokers agree to stop exhaling
5 September 2018
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Citing an inborn curiosity and a strong desire to integrate, a foreign-born resident of the Grand Duchy has succeeded in learning two Luxembourgish words.05/09/2018
Amazing: expat learns two words of Luxembourgish
29 August 2018
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LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — An expat who has rejected the Luxembourgish custom of giving three kisses to female acquaintances will be allowed to give three ...29/08/2018
Luxembourg kissophobes allowed to give three handshakes instead
1 August 2018
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Dozens of people on a bus headed to Kirchberg on Wednesday were confronted with a disturbing sight when a passenger who didn’t have a smartphone was left ...01/08/2018
Heartbreaking: passenger who forgot smartphone swipes at air
5 July 2018
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LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — A 33-year-old postman is being recognised for “exemplary service in the face of serious inconvenience” after making an arduous journey ...05/07/2018
Unbelievable: Postman rings to see if residents are at home
2 July 2018
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Prompting a series of rather clumsy admissions from politicians, diplomats, and historians alike, an old friend from home has asserted that Luxembourg is ...02/07/2018
Confirmed: Luxembourg actually in Germany
25 June 2018
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LUXEMBOURG-VILLE -- At least nine customers at a bakery near the Gare were left angry and helpless on Monday after an unidentified woman brazenly skipped ...25/06/2018
Bakery customers helpless as woman cuts the line