And I’m listening to your favorite song
As you’re skin to skin
Resentment setting in
The part you promised me
Now torn from my grasp
You said to expect this
That it would be what it was
I thought it would be painless
I thought I could take the pain
I have to think again
Think again
Again
You can’t see me
As I fall apart
Bursting at the seams
Nothing as it seems
Anymore
Any. More.
No. More.
Never again.
Build the walls back up
Retrace those steps you took
Circle round
Self protect protocol
Reset the dial
Hide away
Bury deep the shame
What I showed was not enough
It’s never been enough
Never enough.
Never again.
Desperate to rip out this
Fucking battery of flesh
From my aching chest
And as I’m writing my heart
In ink and blood
Everything completely not understood
You’re writhing beneath him
So far away
The only thing I can now see
Is you not with me
Can’t close my eyes
I just watched you leave
Felt you slip away
Knew I was losing you
And I couldn’t ask you to stay
Feelings replaced
A different body shared
Emotions removed
My soul erased
And I struggle to breathe
Someone send a search party
For that which I lost today
I don’t even think
To make myself smile
I don’t even think to think... to think
Can’t. Even. Think.
One foot forward
Get there in the end
Meet myself in the mirror
And remind myself
Just how stupid I have been
How.
Stupid.
I.
Have.
Been.
