We awoke this morning to a loud banging at the door.
This is a longer post than normal. You will see why as you read on.
As we trudged downstairs to investigate, it quickly became apparent that it was an official visit. We opened the door to be greeted by two well-dressed but incredibly intimidating ducks.
The pair, kitted out with mirrored-shades and ear-pieces had rolled-up in a blacked-out SUV. They handed us a document that had been shut with a wax seal.
We signed an NDA (which we are already breaching) in triplicate and the ducks hopped into their vehicle and sped away. We cannot go into too many details (for fear of further legal reprisal) but this is the gist, the intro to the four-page document reads thusly:
“Quack, quack
Quack, whack, qwack, wackwackwaxk, quakQuack kwakquakkwaaaaak quak. Quakqak, quack kwak, quak, wak, wikiiwak, kwak, Kwak Kwak, Donald, Daisy, Ed, wakky awakky, Qwack, quack, Doctors slang, quack. Quack, quacky, kwach wakk, quak, waaaakkk QUACK! Wakka wokka quack quack, whack wak quak qwaaakk, qwak. QUACK!
Quacky quack, kwack”
We ran this through Google real quack (sorry) quick and though the tool is not the most reliable, this is what it gave back;
“Dear Sirs, please accept this formal notice from the Association of Pissed Off Ducks (AOPOD), we politely request that you refrain from using ‘nice weather for ducks’ each and every time it rains. Ducks generally do not mind being linked to Donald (Duck NOT Trump), Daisy and Ed but the continued misrepresentation in the press suggesting that ducks are satisfied with rainy weather is damaging to our brand. In fact, ducks are just as happy kicking back their plumage in the sun as they are in the snow. This cease and desist order should be notarized and returned by no later than May 10, 2020. If not, there will be consequences via strikes and political action. We have Greta on the ‘Gram. Sincerely, Ducks”.
