A month ago, Judge Charlotte came down in favour of a husband who wanted to keep his precious car. The second case brought before the Judge focused on another marital dispute, as she was asked to weigh in on whether a wife should be forced to stick to her own rule on banning technology from the bedroom.
These first two cases saw evidence from both the litigant and the defendant, and this week we are introducing our first solo-case, wherein the defendant opted not to submit any evidence in their defence. A bold move, but will they live to regret it?
The case centres on Rebecca (plaintiff), who seeks an injunction against her husband George (the defendant), through which he is to stop planning social events that include her without first seeking her confirmation. Read Rebecca’s case below or, If you wish, skip straight to Charlotte’s ruling below.
I so get Rebecca! I am, of course, an unopinionated judge and guided by the principle of objectivity but hey, I am only human. Plus, I am an emphatic person. So, I feel for her. I also need my weekends to clear my head, have a break, feel free, get creative and not have the days fully planned and scheduled.
But there is more to this case than granting Rebecca her injunction against George just because I am a kindred spirit in this specific situation. I am referring to George’s audacity to just plan social events without discussing them with her first. Who does that? I find it odd, rude and inconsiderate.
Let’s start with odd. Being in a relationship means that you share your life.
It doesn’t mean that you must do every bleeping thing together. You don’t need to hold hands all the time and tell your partner when and how long you plan to go to the loo.
But in my experience, the best relationships – for as far as one can ever know the truth about those – are those in which people take each other into account when making a decision. Solid couples discuss almost everything. From life’s bigger issues (Shall I take that job or not? Are we ready to try to have kids? Or even: Shall we have a glass or a bottle for lunch?) to life’s smaller choices (Will we buy a gas or coal BBQ for this summer? Shall I dye my hair blue? Shall we invite A and B over for dinner?)
I may be out on a limb here, but I think that it is fairly normal for couples to discuss plans and invitations before accepting them. So not doing so is odd.
I also think it rude that George just adds events to Rebecca’s weekend’s social calendar. I have asked around because I was curious. But no, none of my friends do this. No one accepts an invitation on behalf of their spouse without consulting them. It’s just ill mannered. Plain and simple.
Finally, it is inconsiderate because George knows how much Rebecca appreciates and needs her freedom, ‘me-time’, family time and room to get creative during her weekend. Every time he accepts an invitation or plans an event without discussing it with her is a slap in her face. Her seeking my injunction means that she’s had enough of those.
However, marriage is about finding the right balance and having to compromise. As it takes two to tango, Rebecca can’t have it her way completely. She must adapt a little bit to George’s wishes. He is a social animal, and he obviously wants to be social with Rebecca by his side. Not only should Rebecca be glad (it would be worse if he didn’t want her by his side), but she should also humor him from time to time and happily go along.
Furthermore, creativity can be planned. It may sound mutually exclusive, creativity and planning, but just ask other writers. Read up on interviews with authors. Rebecca will find that many of them have tight schedules and fixed working hours. Sometimes the writing flows out of their pens, sometimes it doesn’t. But it almost always starts with just sitting down behind a desk and getting to work. It is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration. Yours truly will happily testify to that…
I allow for the injunction that Rebecca is requesting. George is from now on barred from putting any event in her calendar that she hasn’t been consulted on beforehand.
However, to keep George happy, their marriage well-balanced and also enjoy events outside of work and home (there is more to life, Rebecca!), Rebecca must accept social events. She may keep one weekend per month completely open; George can then plan something fun without her – but the other weekends, she will join George to attend a social gathering. Finally, the Court of Charlotte requires her to do so with a smile on her face.
Do you have a case to present to the Court? Simply fill out this form, and your case will be sent directly to the court clerk. Once submitted, Charlotte may just provide a ruling as part of RTL Today’s commitment to justice and familial, neighbourly, and communal peace.
