Luxembourg-based families share their experience and approaches to bilingualism

Raising bilingual children presents unique challenges, as demonstrated by two families in Luxembourg, each committed to fostering language skills for a global future. Rachel, a French native, and Emma, a British-Italian mother, navigate the complexities of teaching their children English while balancing their cultural identities.

Both families chose English-speaking schools in Luxembourg to ensure their children develop fluent English, but the path is filled with linguistic, emotional, and educational hurdles.

Rachel and her husband are French natives, living in France 

Their three children attend the English section of the International School in Differdange, Luxembourg.

I grew up in France, studied English at university and spent a few years abroad in the UK and Canada. My husband and I are raising our children to be bilingual. English, the most widely spoken international language, has always been important to me and it was a lifelong dream that my children would grow up speaking it. We travel abroad regularly so I wanted my children to be on par with native English speakers as I felt this would give them the skills and independence necessary to communicate anywhere in the world. In Luxembourg, my children are growing up in competition with children who speak three or four languages, and I believe that speaking fluent English alongside their native French will offer them better travel and employment opportunities.

My two eldest children went to an English-speaking crèche before attending St George's International School. All three are now enrolled in the English section in Differdange. We chose an English-speaking school rather than a bilingual school so the children would be educated solely in English and exposed to more native speakers.

We live in France, have French family and friends, and the children do extra-curricular activities in French. We consider French to be our majority language. We speak almost exclusively French at home because my husband doesn't speak English. I only speak English with the children when I am helping them with their homework or reading. I notice my children sometimes play together in English, when they bring home games they usually play at school, or when they use phrases they might use at school and there is no direct translation, such as 'pinky promise' or 'jinx'! Sometimes we watch a film together in English.

There are of course some difficulties in raising bilingual children and I have often been questioned and criticised for my decision. As my husband doesn't speak English, I am the only parent who can help with homework and tests, email teachers, attend parents' meetings and so on. And I worry that when they reach a certain level at school, I will feel limited in how much I can help them. Sometimes it concerns my husband because he can't participate much in their schooling or communicate with parents of other children in the class. The language barrier was obvious when my mother came to the children's Christmas shows and didn't understand the songs.

My children have never questioned the decision of sending them to an English-speaking school, although I do sense their frustration sometimes in not being able to express themselves as well in English as they can in their native French. My eldest is getting much better at writing in French as he gets older, and he has learnt to conjugate verbs in his French lessons at school. But my middle son finds it problematic that, despite living in his home country and understanding everything people say to him, he is unable to read or write in his native language.

Overall, they enjoy going to an English-speaking school and they are proud of their bilingualism. Being bilingual encourages flexibility and open-mindedness, and my children are very happy growing up alongside those from different cultures and countries.

Top tips:  

• Keep using both languages, especially the minority language. 
• Try to meet people: find friends who speak the target language, organise play dates with native speakers.  
• Do activities together to focus on the minority language, like watching a film.
• I was very determined to make it work for my children, you have got to be motivated and consistent to succeed. 

Emma is British and her husband is Italian. They live in Belgium 

Emma’s children both attend the English section of the International School in Differdange, Luxembourg. 

Emma, British, and her husband, Italian, live in Belgium. / © Emma

It was obvious from the start that our children would learn both English and Italian. My husband and I both felt it was important that they could communicate in both languages to maintain connectivity to both sides of the family. The boys have deeper relationships with their families in England and Italy because they are bilingual. Secondly, it was vital to us both that they would grow up to embrace and understand their own culture, seeing as they were born in Belgium and identify in some ways as Belgian.

I speak to my children in English, and my husband speaks to them in Italian. They are learning French at school, which is important as we live in a French speaking country, but our priority is bilingualism. The boys have been schooled in English, they love English, most of their friends are English. English is the language they always choose to speak and feel most comfortable in. So, the majority language is English.

Having said that, the predominant culture in our house is Italian. Food, traditions, family meals, we approach things in a very Italian way. Most of our holidays are spent in Italy with family and friends, to immerse ourselves in the Italian way of life, but we also visit the UK twice a year. The boys' Italian is not as good as their English and my husband sometimes expresses disappointment in the fact that they don't use Italian as much as we would like. It sometimes feels like they choose not to speak Italian. We tried speaking just Italian at home once a week, but it didn't last. My eldest has weekly online Italian classes and has just switched to Italian as his first language (L1) at school, which will hopefully prove to be beneficial in the long term. Overall, we agree to use the language we're each most comfortable in so we can express ourselves fully.

We have experienced a few drawbacks raising bilingual children. There is some anxiety surrounding the minority language and children who are not as linguistically minded can struggle. My eldest didn’t speak in full sentences until he was four, and even though that is normal for a bilingual child, it made us feel like we weren’t doing enough. Typically, the boys have tended to be slightly below average reading and writing levels, which has led to teachers questioning whether my children have learning difficulties. There is an expectation that a bilingual child is the same as a monolingual child, which can be problematic.

Now that my eldest is a teenager, he sometimes tells us we're making him 'suffer' through forcing him to choose Italian as his L1 at school and tends to blame us if he gets a poor grade. It does upset me to see my boys struggling at times, but we encourage them to keep going, build up their resilience and embrace the challenge and the mental stimulation. For us, the positives of being bilingual far outweigh the negatives.

Top tips:

• Believe in your vision and stick with it.
• Help children understand that their linguistic ability enables them to deepen family relationships, develop new skills and access opportunities.
• Stay in control and don’t give up. Your children don’t necessarily know what’s best for them right now, but they’ll thank you when they’re older! 

Read more – Raising a bilingual child