How to handle moving with children and how to prepare them

Moving house is often cited as one of life's most stressful events. Add to this the worry of how your children will deal with the upcoming change, and it can all become rather anxiety-inducing. Here are a few tips on how to handle a move with children.

Before the move

Be open, be honest. Transparency is key to ensuring your child doesn't feel left out or blindsided. Let them know as early as possible that you plan to move house and explain the reasons why. Allow them to ask questions and try to answer as honestly as possible.

Check in with your child regularly and give them adequate space to express their emotions and talk about their feelings. Let their teachers and other caregivers know that you are moving house, as they may be able to provide some vital emotional support and encouragement.

No matter their age, involve your children in the preparations. Could they have a look at real estate websites with you, pointing out their favourite house or apartment? Maybe you could explore some photos or maps of the place you'll be moving to or take a little drive out to see where the nearest playground is.

Perhaps your child is old enough to help with some packing. Give them a couple of boxes and pack a few things together, talking about how fun it will be when you unpack them in the new house. Let them plan what their new bedroom might look like. Talk about painting the walls in their favourite colour, or putting up some wall stickers and posters to make them feel right at home.

Remember not to pack your child's favourite cuddly toy into a box! Emotions will be running high on moving day, without the added meltdown of losing your child's favourite teddy. So keep the plushies somewhere safe, in a rucksack or a carry on, which is guaranteed to stay with you at all times.

If your child is very young, ensure they have correctly understood what moving house will entail. Correct any misconceptions (such as whether the move is temporary or permanent, or a personal favourite, is the entire house going to be moved or just the contents?!)

Moving day

If you've hired a moving company, little ones will be especially excited to see a big lorry arrive in the morning! Introduce the children to the movers, who might be happy to give your little ones a tour of the lorry or show them how things will be transported.

Say goodbye to the old house. Maybe younger children might like to make a goodbye video or take photos of their old bedroom or favourite spot in the garden. Walk through each room together, talk about special memories, and get a family portrait taken on the doorstep.

Ensure you have childcare in place for younger children on moving day. It's great if they can stay with a friend, neighbour, or family member; someone familiar who can keep them updated and check in with a quick video call to mum or dad. Older children might be able to help out on moving day, but make sure to give them a specific role or job to do.

At the new place, the children's bedrooms should be the first rooms to be sorted. Ask the movers if the boxes can be loaded last and unpacked first in order to enable this. Your child will feel much more comfortable in their new surroundings if they have their familiar furniture and toys around them.

On the first evening in your new place, plan to have a meal all together as a family. Even if you haven't managed to assemble all your furniture, having a takeaway pizza or a picnic on the floor can be an exciting moment to celebrate your move together! Make sure parents have got some plastic cups ready to share a bottle of crémant - you'll need it after your long day!

After the move

It's time to explore! Take a walk around your new neighbourhood, find the closest playgrounds and try to be enthusiastic about your new surroundings as your children adjust. Look for clubs for your child to join, such as sports teams or music groups, to establish some cultural and social roots in the new place.

Introduce yourselves to your new neighbours. It's a good idea to take your children with you to say hello to the people living directly around you. Your child could even bake some cookies to distribute to the neighbours. A friendly hello will get everyone off to a good start; it also gives you a chance to find out if there are any children in the vicinity of a similar age to your child.

It won't all be excitement and discovery. Be prepared for grief, upset, stress, fatigue, and even signs of depression in older children. It's hard to leave behind friends, family, and familiar things. Your child will mourn for their old house and their previous life.

Ask your child how they are settling in and invite them to tell you how they feel after a day, a week, a month. It's important to acknowledge and share your feelings too. Perhaps you could tell them that you're also finding it difficult being in a new place, and that you miss your old home.

It's a good idea to schedule video calls or visits with old neighbours and friends, so that you and your child can keep in touch with loved ones.

But remember that it's equally important to move forward and embrace your new surroundings. So, make plans to get involved with community events, spend time out and about, and get exploring! Children are resilient and quick to adapt, so we hope that your little ones will feel at home in no time!